straight people on tv show: *literally have sex*
gay people on tv show: *exist*
ok.. :\ but… ok like im not homophobic… :\ im ok with gay people but why do you have to shove it in my face… :\
caterpillars have more muscles than humans but i’d like to see one try to fight me irl and see what happens
me: YAAAAS BITCH SNATCH MY SOUL WITH THESE VOCALS!!!!!!
Simon Cowell: I wasn’t feeling it…you lost control the whole time….absolutely horrifying.
me: yeah girl that was dry as hell #try again
I have the talent of getting tired without doing nothing
staff at checkout: that’ll be $9.95
me: here’s $10.00
me: keep the change
People who chew ice cream are people that are not to be fucked with.
heroin addict? no, heroine addict. please give me more leading ladies i need them to survive
the only ship i need is a scholarship can i get a hallelujah